• Claire Huxtable/Giphy.com
    Public Service Announcement,  Story Time

    Public Service Announcement: Beware of Strays!

    I appreciate Fall for so many reasons (see here and here). It’s a reprieve from the outrageous heat of the Summer. I get to wrap this body in layers of warmth and eat all the soup/stew/chili recipes I have saved on Pinterest. However, it’s also the time of year where people seek potential companions to snuggle up with. Within the pool of potential companions are strays.

    What is a stray?

    A stray is a man or woman who has nothing but seeks someone who has what they don’t have. They provide little to nothing in return.  

    Story time!

    I took in a stray once. He had a full-time job, lived with his brother, and “circumstances” prevented him from owning a vehicle (feel free to read between the lines there). Did I mention that he had a set of twins plus another child that were only months apart in age (yes, you read that right)?

    That’s a lot, but it wasn’t enough for me to walk away. Keep reading.

    In the beginning, I didn’t mind doing the driving. I would pick him up from work and take him to either his brother’s place or mine.

    [bctt tweet=”When the newness of love wears off, you see people and things for who and what they truly are.” username=”MsWalton”]

    In his case, it was his financial situation that tipped the scales for me. He tended to spend his money on wants, not needs. This particular evening I picked him up from work. He got in the car and didn’t say much most of the ride. After some prodding, he tells me that he lost his part of the rent money on a game he gambled on.

    *rolls eyes*

    I was livid for all the reasons. He then said that when he told his brother about the loss, his brother put him out. There’s this awkward silence in the car, that’s broken when he asked me if he could stay with me until he got himself together.

    Claire Huxtable/Giphy.com
    Claire Huxtable/Giphy.com

    I told him I would think about it. I dropped him off at his mother’s and went home. Realizing that his situation was quickly becoming MY situation, I packed up the little belongings he had at my apartment and took them to his mother’s house later that night. I dropped that duffel bag on her front step with a note telling him that I didn’t want to continue our relationship and that he didn’t need to contact me…ever. That was almost a decade ago and so far, I haven’t heard from him.

    I’m sharing this moment of my life because I want you to pay attention. Allow yourself to see what’s being presented to you in that moment and act accordingly. Falling for potential can get you wrapped up in some bullsh!t, trust me.

    Until next time,

    MsWalton

     

     

     

  • Blogging

    How to Avoid Blogger Overwhelm

    Blogging is pretty awesome. I get to talk about the things I want to talk about in hopes that somebody will learn from my mistakes and/or experiences. But that’s only one end of the blogging spectrum. On the other end, blogging can be overwhelming. With so much information accessible from multiple sources, you may not know how to apply it. Or, you may be unsure if you should even apply it.

    The Recovering Pessimist: How to Avoid Blogger Overwhelm -- Being a blogger is great and whatnot, but don't let that fool you. On the other side of the spectrum is blogger overwhelm and that beast can suck you in if you aren't proactive. I shared a few tips that help me avoid blogger overwhelm. Enjoy!  | #amwriting #recoveringpessimist #optimisticpessimist
    Help Me/Giphy.com

    I’m all too familiar with that feeling of overwhelm & I don’t want you to go through it. Below are a few tips I’ve acquired on avoiding blogger overwhelm:


    You Can Only Plan So Much Before You Launch

    There was no launch plan for this blog. I came up with the domain, grabbed a (free) theme, and started writing. In hindsight, I should’ve at least planned somewhat & saved myself some time and/or energy. Besides, if you find yourself waist-deep in planning mode, you may never launch because you want everything to be perfect. And you know how perfection goes. insert eye roll here

    [bctt tweet=”Perfection doesn’t exist in general, and it definitely doesn’t exist in the blogging world.” username=”MsWalton”]

    Don’t Get Wrapped Up in the Money Game

    Being able to make money from your blog is awesome. The internet is full of sources for you to learn how to make  x amount of dollars from your blog. It’s also misleading. Rarely did I read/watch a blogger be truly honest with how they made x amount of money in such as short amount of time. Regina blew the lid off of that mystery by writing an awesome blog post about avoiding getting caught up in the six figure blogger gang.

    Which brings me to the next point:

    Question Everything!

    Just because it sounds good, doesn’t mean it’s good for you. Don’t just take the information you read and/or hear at face value. Question it. How does this apply to you? Can you afford the good/service? If not, can you find an inexpensive way to get the good/service?

    [bctt tweet=”Question everything. Your time and money are valuable. Be critical of who/what you spend it on.” username=”MsWalton”]

    You Gotta Work to Gain AND Keep Subscribers

    Gaining subscribers is one of the top goals for many bloggers. Makes perfect sense. But let me let you in on a little secret:

    [bctt tweet=”You can’t treat subscribers like trophies on a shelf. You have to work to keep them. ” username=”MsWalton”]

    Simple and to the point. And speaking of subscribing…

    Don’t Subscribe to Every Single Newsletter if It Doesn’t Help You

    A few months ago, I looked at my email inbox and I kid you not, I had at least 14 emails from different newsletters I was subscribed to. Mind you those emails were from one day. Of those 14 maybe three or four were of actual use to me. Most of them I subscribed to in order to get a freebie and then had no use for the newsletter afterwards.

    My inbox and I deserve so much better.

    So I finally went through them and deleted all but maybe four or five. I don’t sigh and roll my eyes anymore when I look at my inbox now.

    [bctt tweet=”Don’t feel like you need to subscribe to every newsletter you come across. Be critical of your inbox space” username=”MsWalton”]


    I hope you find these tips useful. If you’ve suffered from blogger overwhelm, how did you get through it, I would love to hear about it.

    Until next time,

    MsWalton

  • The Complexities of Life

    Random Thought #5: Break Through

    The Recovering Pessimist: Random Thought #5: Break Through -- Communication isn't effective once a wall has been built. Discover your breakthrough and work past it. | www.therecoveringpessimist.me #amwriting #recoveringpessimist #optimisticpessimistWhile watching Season 12, Episode 1 of Grey’s Anatomy, a lack of communication affected the characters and patients. There’s a lot of talking back and forth, but nobody is really listening.

    The episode was an example of what happens when the lines of communication break down. Communication is the key to all relationships. All parties involved need to work together for communication to be successful.

    So many of the disagreements I had with people stemmed from a lack of communication. I’d get so wrapped up in my emotions and/or opinions that I wouldn’t listen to what the other party was saying. A

    [bctt tweet=”You can’t talk to a brick wall and expect the brick wall to talk back. “]

    The results repeated themselves: long bouts of not speaking to one another. Eventually, I’d give up without attempting to talk things out. It worked for a while, but over time, I started to feel like crap for not being the bigger person. Most of the issues were petty and could be resolved by just working through it.

    [bctt tweet=”We have to figure out how we’re going to break through the wall that lack of communication built. “]

    Until you realize that you have to break through the wall that lack of communication built, history will continue to repeat itself. Do better.

  • My Faves

    My 2015 Fall Faves

    The Recovering Pessimist: My 2015 Fall Faves -- With the fall season approaching, here are a few of my faves. | www.therecoveringpessimist.me #amwriting #optimisticpessimist #recoveringpessimistFall is in full swing. Despite my allergies/sinuses being all over the place, I’m extremely excited for the next couple months of cooler weather.

    1. Combat Boots

    –  Cooler weather brings boots. Combat boots are my shoe of choice. Paired with some skinny jeans, a light sweater/sweatshirt, and cute boot socks, I’m in heaven.

    2. Hot Chocolate

    – I’m a huge dark chocolate fan! Hunkering down on the sofa wrapped up in a blanket with a hot mug of dark chocolate hot cocoa is perfection during this time of year. Hold the marshmallows though.

    3. Stews/Soups/Crockpot Goodness

    – Chillier air calls for heavier meals in my house, specifically stews and soups. With sunset occurring early, cooking these meals with a crockpot is mandatory. I have a ton of stew and soup recipes on my Pinterest page.

    4. Taking photos of all the color changes.

    – When the leaves start to change colors before they fall, I put my camera to good use. It’s the last splash of color from Mother Nature until Spring. *insert loud sigh here*

    5. Jumping in leaf piles

    – Once I’m done taking photos of the pretty leaves, I release my inner child and jump in piles of leaves. Don’t judge me. We all have to indulge our inner child once in a while.

    6. Rainy days/nights

    – Rain + cool weather = Pure Bliss. Enough said.

    7. Snuggle weather

    – Cool weather = Get cozy with a comfy blanket of your choice. Feel free to substitute or add your favorite snuggle buddy to that equation.

    8. Apple everything!

    – Most people associate this season with all pumpkin everything. I, however, obsess over apples. Fried apples, apple crumble, apple pie, apple pie smoothies, apple cider, etc.

    9. Dark lipstick/glosses

    – I don’t even wear makeup, but I LOVES me some dark lipstick/lip gloss. I have a dark purple in my arsenal already, but my makeup board on Pinterest has me adding a black lipstick to my shopping list.

    10. All my favorite shows come back to TV!!!

    – When you’re a dedicated fan of a TV show, having to wait alllll summer for its return is painful. Thankfully Scandal, Greys’s Anatomy, How to Get Away with Murder,  and Empire have already premiered for the fall. Just waiting on The Walking Dead, American Horror Story: Hotel, and The Blacklist.

    Tell me, are you looking forward to the start of fall? If yes, let me know what a few of your favorite things about fall. If no, tell me why you aren’t excited about the change in season.

  • The Complexities of Life

    Fall Defined

    Fall is a flash of reds, yellows, and browns. These colors fall from their perch, dancing their way to the ground. The wind is chilly, caressing my face and tickling my nose. Rain creates puddles enticing me to jump in.

    I wrap myself in the warmth of sweaters and jackets. My feet cozy in thick socks and boots. I wish the weather would stay this way until the birth of Spring but alas, that it is not meant to be.

    Night begins earlier, the darkness misleading. Hot beverages warm a chilly body in the morning air. Evenings are spent watching fall TV shows in the glow of a burning candle, cuddled up in a blanket.

    Crock pots slowly cook soups and stews. Pumpkin spice everything fill the shelves. Ovens bake goods sprinkled with cinnamon, cloves, and nutmeg. Apples and cranberries are the fruit of the season.

    The season never seems to last long enough but I enjoy the time that it’s here. So excited for the festivals, baked goods, and apple cider. Another season of memories.

    Welcome Fall.

  • The Complexities of Life

    Preying on Opportunity

    American Greed
    American Greed (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

    I’m a HUGE fan of the CNBC show “American Greed” for a couple of reasons. One, I’m always amazed at how gullible some of these victims are. On the “Preying on Faith” case, a pastor traveled all over the country preaching the word to various churches. While preaching the word, he would talk about a program he had. Under the program, churches would invest money in exchange for a large financial return.

    Of course, people fell for it.

    How was he able to scam so many? He literally preyed on faith. Morally, it’s every bit of wrong. I felt sorry for those who put all of their money together for the investment. They believed that a man of God wouldn’t scam them.

    But at some point during the episode, I was even more amazed that these same people were believing the excuses for why they weren’t receiving their promised returns of big money. I’m talking about months of not seeing any money and NOBODY rang the alarm that maybe something isn’t quite right.

    C’mon now! If it sounds too good to be true, IT’S PROBABLY TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE!!!

    Moral of the story: Take nothing at face value!! If it doesn’t sit right with you, start researching. Don’t get wrapped up in the shiny outcome that you don’t analyze the steps to get there.

     

  • Public Service Announcement,  The Complexities of Life

    Public Service Announcement: Living a Life of Public Access

    People are doing way too much on social media. Any given day, I can log into my social media accounts and read status updates about cheating, divorce, last night’s date, random itching, etc.

    Yes, random itching.

    What’s even worse is that they’re over sharing with no consideration of the possible backlash. There’s absolutely no way that they’re considering any sort of backlash because they’re just out. Social media is the new public access TV. Millions of people have access to it and status updates can go viral in seconds.

    People are watching and taking notes. Don’t allow yourself to become blinded by the share button. Once you post that information out there for the world to see, it’s a wrap. You can delete it, but that doesn’t mean that someone hasn’t already captured it in a screenshot or some other method.

    Is that post about last night’s date that left you randomly itching really worth it?

    Me thinks not.

  • Story Time

    #XD30-Chapter 23-Lessons from Uncle Jeff

    The sun greets me with a warm kiss on the cheek. Once again, I’ve fallen asleep on the sofa. The pleasing aroma of bacon and maple syrup fill the air. Praise Sweet Baby Jesus, Ashley’s cooking! Giddy, I get up, shuffling my way to the kitchen.

    “Well hello Chef,” I say seductively.

    Ashley’s dressed in a hot pink lace slip.  I debate on whether I want to attack her or that plate of bacon. The woes of a pregnant woman. Ashley sways her ample hips back and forth.

    “I know what you want. Come and get it.”

    She didn’t have to tell me twice. Walking up behind Ashley, I wrap my arm around her waist, tickling her stomach. She moans. My fingers trail past her stomach, grabbing two slices of peppered bacon. Ashley turns, spanking me on the ass with her hand.

    “Move greedy ass,” she demands, giggling. “Breakfast will be ready in a few.”

    Frowning, I stomp over to a bar stool at the counter. Watching Ashley pour the last of the batter into the waffle maker, I realize it’s now or never.

    “Did you pay Nick off?”

    Silence…until the waffle maker beeped. Ashley seizes the opportunity to avoid answering my question. Placing the hot waffle and a pile of bacon on a plate, she cautiously places the food in front of me. I lightly grab her arm.

    “The truth Ashley. I want the truth.”

    Defeated, she slumps against the fridge.

    “As soon as you told me about that Halloween party, I made a financial arrangement with Nick to keep our secrets.”

    She’s fidgeting, which means she’s withholding something. With my fork, I gesture for her to continue. She wipes her forehead with a paper towel.

    “Jesus Susan, what else do you need to know?!”

    Did she just fucking say that to me?!

    “Two can play this game Ashley. Why would Nick tell you to pay Yelena?”

    Ashley’s face pales with guilt.

    “I…I…,” she stutters, her body shaking, tears rolling down her face.

    “STOP BULLSHITTING ME!!!” I scream, throwing the fork in her direction. She ducks, waving her hand.

    “Dammit!! Okay! Okay! Yelena and I dated for 18 months before you and I got together. When we got together, I broke up with Yelena.”

    I say nothing and continue eating. A couple of minutes of silence should scare her. As I chew the last of my food, I stand up and walk towards the den. Minutes later, Ashley follows me.

    “Say something!” she yells, her voice shaky.

    Standing in front of the bookshelf, I reach for a vintage-looking dictionary. I open it, taking out my beloved Smith & Wesson M&P .357. Ashley gasps.

    “Where…how long…a gun…”

    “I inherited it from Uncle Jeff. He always told his nieces to never rely on anyone to protect you. Taught me the art of the take down with one bullet.”

    I walk over to her, gun by my side, and brush her hair out of her face with my free hand.

    “He also taught me that money doesn’t keep crazy away.”