Recently, I was going through some old photos. Forgotten memories shared with people I no longer have friendships with. As I reflected on how the demise of our friendships occurred, I was reminded of something my mother constantly stressed to me when I was younger:
You ARE the company that you keep.
I met a group of women through a coworker I had befriended. We were all in constant contact with one another via text, phone calls, emails, social media, etc. We had a lot of fun together. Eventually, I grew tired of going out 3-4 times a week. I wanted to go back to school and in order for me to do that, partying would have to cease.
They didn’t like that decision. Instead of being supportive, they couldn’t understand why I couldn’t go to school and party with them on weekends. I explained to them that school isn’t just on the weekdays. School was going to be my top priority and if they don’t like it, tough shit.
The photos reminded me of how over-saturated our friendship was. Way too much of a good thing. I miss them at times. We’ve matured and moved on with our lives.
Take a minute to analyze the people in your life. If the people in your life bring you support and positivity, great. No really, great. If you find that there are people in your life who provide nothing but bad karma, give ’em the boot.
They’re no good for you.
While doing some emotional spring cleaning, I realized that there are some people in my life that take without giving, and they have to go.
Friendships work like ATMS. As long as you have the funds available to sustain the friendship, the friendship works. The moment the funds start to dwindle is when the friendship becomes insufficient.
I’m tired of putting funds into this friendship while the other parties continue to withdraw from the accounts. This time isn’t like all the others when I just “deal with it”. I’m pissed. I’ve put water in the pot. Put the pot on the stove. Turned the stove on and now the water is boiling over.
I’m closing the account and redistributing funds amongst the friendships that matter to me.
Falling in love with a friend. A blessing and a curse. It’s awesome that you’ve fallen in love with someone who “gets” you. Being friends before lovers is a definite must as far as relationships are concerned.
Before you decide to step into the murky waters of the unknown, there’s so much to consider. Do they feel the same way? If they don’t feel the same way, will things be weird between you? What if they feel the same way and the relationship doesn’t work out? Can you remain friends? Do you even want to risk your friendship? So many emotions.
This song sums it up perfectly. Enjoy!
A good friend of mine is going through some things. He’s just got himself together after another series of events that shook his core. To see life deal another hand of unfavorable cards to him is truly a test. As a friend, I know that I had to be there to support him. Experience has taught me that sometimes the weight can be too heavy for you to carry alone.
Even if the weight is too heavy, people may feel uncomfortable asking for help. At times, my friend can be like this. Recent events have him in a level 4 (of 5) funk. That’s deep. He’ll internalize whatever emotions he’s feeling, but I can sense that that something is bothering him. Until he is ready to talk, I provide support in a very stealth-like manner.
This type of support is a combination of intuition and a thorough knowledge of that person. If I didn’t know him as well as I do, I wouldn’t be able to know what he needs before he does. It kind of reminds me of a Secret Service. You may not be able to see them, but they’re always there.
Just call me Secret Agent Lucky Lefty.