Allow me to set the scene. You’re out and about when s someone catches your eye. Nerves are brushed aside as the two of you have a brief conversation. Phone numbers (and possibly social media handles) are exchanged. Hours are spent texting, calling, emailing, and/or posting social media updates. You really, really like this person.

In theory, this sounds great. Seriously, who doesn’t want to find that person that tickles your fancy? I honestly can’t think of anyone that doesn’t. However, like some theories, there’s a problem with the execution. In this case, said problem began weeks ago.

The person that you’re attracted to is working towards accomplishing something (entrepreneur, college graduate, etc). But you don’t see them for the person they are now. Instead, you’re attracted to the person that they’re trying to become.

I’ve seen this happen too many times. People will get with folks for the end goal, whatever that may be. They’ll stay around provided that the person of interest becomes the person their working towards. In the even that said person of interest doesn’t become that person, suddenly he/she isn’t as attractive as they once were.

We’re all works in progress, every last one of us, including you. Solely seeing someone for their potential won’t end well, I promise you.

Updated March 6, 2015