The Recovering Pessimist

Helping pessimists see the bright side of life without losing their "half empty" roots.

So About That Apology

Feb
11

When you’re truly apologetic for something, you acknowledge that your words and/or behavior were out of order. You mean what you say. And even if the receiver of the apology doesn’t forgive you, at least you know your apology was sincere.

Not every apology is sincere, though. When someone’s apology is insincere, it shows. It comes off as condescending and/or passive-aggressive. Here’s a classic example of an insincere apology:

“I’m sorry if I said (or did) something that hurt your feelings.”

All that waste of breath did was pack more salt into the wound. Nobody wants a half-ass apology.

An insincere apology is an insult.

Don’t pack more salt into the wound. If the only apology you can muster is half-ass, don’t apologize.

Until next time,

Joy

 

Wisdom Wednesday #266

Feb
06

Wisdom Wednesday #265

Jan
30

Wisdom Wednesday #264

Jan
23

What Are Your Options?

Jan
21

The Recovering Pessimist | "What Are Your Options?" | Every idea I have comes with at least 2 other options, just in case things go left. Having those options make me feel comfortable and prepared. | www.therecoveringpessimist.me #amwriting #recoveringpessimist #optimisticpessimist

Photo by Dose Media on Unsplash

I’ve never subscribed to the idea of only having one chance (or opportunity) to make it happen. That’s a lot of pressure. I don’t want to make myself anxious asking myself the same questions:

What if it doesn’t work?

What am I going to do next?

No matter how confident you are with your idea, things can go left at any moment. Oftentimes without any sort of warning. How will you handle the situation?

You don't forfeit ideas because you didn't have other options.

Keep a few options in your back pocket. Just in case.

Until next time,

Joy

 

Wisdom Wednesday #263

Jan
16

Life Through A Dirty Lens

Jan
14

The Recovering Pessimist | "Life Through A Dirty Lens" | It's hard to see through the lens of life when your thoughts are making your vision blurry. How do you clean your lens so you can focus? | www.therecoveringpessimist.me #amwriting #recoveringpessimist #optimisticpessimist

Photo by Samara Doole on Unsplash

Ever look through a dirty lens?

Your immediate reaction is to clean the lens so you can focus, right?

With that in mind, let’s apply that concept to life in general. It’s hard to see through the lens of life when the chaos (internally and/or externally) is making it impossible to focus?

How do you clean your lens?

I write everything that’s blurring my vision (pen + paper, notes app, etc). I feel lighter just from writing everything down. Next, I sort through what’s written, placing things into categories based on importance/need. Then, I work through my thoughts in order of importance/need.

By doing this, I’ve noticed that this process helps me recognize when life is about to get chaotic before it happens. Learning this process has been an important life lesson.

You can't be your best self with blurred vision. Clean your lens.

Until next time,

Joy

Wisdom Wednesday #262

Jan
09

Wisdom Wednesday #261

Jan
02

Prioritizing in 2019

Dec
31

My 2019 mantra is inspired by the madness that was 2018. I made 10 goals for 2018. I was excited for 2018 to begin. Each week, I blocked out time in my planner to work on my goals. I was making things happen from January to the end of March.  

April arrived. My productivity shifted. I found myself blocking off less time in my planner. Working on my 10 goals turned into me only working on four goals, which I accomplished. The six remaining goals never made it out of the planning phase. 

Why?

I didn’t prioritize.

Once I worked past the realization, I started planning on how I wanted to prioritize in 2019. There are two ways I want to make this happen: 

Streamline My Goals

Making 10 goals last year was overwhelming To avoid that in 2019, I’m making 2-3 core goals that I can work on throughout the year. I also want to make smaller goals that I’ll accomplish in a shorter timeframe. Speaking of time…

Be Mindful of My Time

It’s wasteful to block off hours at a time to get something done. I’m more productive at night, but that’s not always possible. If I know I have a certain amount of hours to be productive, that’s what I have to work with. Once that time is up, I can keep working if I feel like it. But I don’t force it.

Oftentimes, it’s a simple solution to a difficult problem that eludes us. Don’t overthink it. If you need to step away in order to figure things out, do it.

Cheers to 2019!

 

Wisdom Wednesday #260

Dec
26

My 2018 Wrap Up

Dec
24

What. A. Year.

I accomplished things. Learned a lesson or two.

I did some things. I didn’t do some things. I learned things. The following are the lessons and highlights of my 2018.

I don’t need all of the time

I’ve always struggled with time management. I’d do good with it for a bit and then I’d waste it. Rinse and repeat. I’m not sure what happened this year, but something finally clicked:

I need to maximize the time I have.

On weekdays after my full-time job, I have a good 2-3 hours of time to use wisely before I start to wind down for bed. I wasn’t always using this time to my advantage. In recent months, I made some adjustments.

First, I switched up the design of the Wisdom Wednesday template for 2019. Instead of creating multiple templates for those blog posts, I’ve got one template for the entire year. I can’t begin to tell you how I excited I am to not have to spend time keeping up with all of that.

Second, I write on the go. I started this blog post on the mobile WordPress app. I’m kinda ashamed that I haven’t used the WordPress app as much as I should. I can create the bones of blog posts while I’m waiting, on my lunch breaks, etc.

You don't need to block off hours to do a 30-minute task. Tighten up.

Celebrate My Wins

Sooo…I did some peak adulthood ish this summer by becoming a homeowner!!!! I’m just getting over the shock of it all. Things happened so fast that I didn’t really get a chance to celebrate this huge accomplishment. Thankfully, there’s no time limit on celebrating wins!

I also embraced JOMO (Joy Of Missing Out). For as long as I could remember, I hated not being in the loop. It pained me to turn down an invite to dinner, an event, happy hour, etc. Now that I’m on the other end of my 30s, I love staying at home.

I've learned to stop and celebrate my wins before I move onto the next thing. Enjoy these moments.

Make space for the unexpected

I LOVES me a routine! I have routines for weekdays and for weekends. While there’s a bit of flexibility built into my routines, I get irritated when my routines are thrown off.

Throughout the year, I released the grip I had on my routines. I experienced so many things that were totally unexpected. Met some awesome people, had dope conversations, and even got a boost to my creativity. That’s a win-win I can get with.

Although my routine was thrown off throughout the year, the memories created as a result were well worth it.

Be Kind to Myself

When I don’t do what I feel I should be doing, I have a tendency to beat myself up. It could be a combination of forgetting, failure to plan accordingly, or plain ol’ fatigue. To make things worse, I feel bad for beating myself up about doing what I feel I should be doing. Good grief!

After experiencing burnout several times during the year, I had enough of myself. I can’t continue to beat myself up for how I feel.

Being kind to myself is a daily practice. Some days I'll do well and some days won't be so good. That is okay.

This concludes my 2018 wrap up. How was your year? I’d love to hear about it in the comments and/or social media.

See ya in 2019!

Joy

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