For months I’ve had this feeling that something was going to happen. I didn’t know if it was good or bad. I also didn’t know the parties involved or the time frame. All I knew was something was happening. That’s it.
Fast forward to a couple of weeks ago. A chain of events occurred involving someone I was close to. It was the emotional equivalent of peeling layers on an onion. Each layer revealed a side of that person that I didn’t like. By the end, I felt like I was friends with a stranger.
To know someone for so long only to realize I didn’t know the person at all is a blow to my spirit. Consumed with anxiety and anger, I blamed myself for being so stupid. However, after spending some time writing in my journal, I was able to sort out my emotions.
In fact, I wasn’t stupid. I was loyal and there’s nothing wrong with that. I treated that person well and my intentions were always good. Constantly reminding myself of that eventually eliminated the anxiety and anger. Once I worked past the emotions, I could start processing what was happening.
What I learned was this:
I’m not going to lie, you may find it difficult to ignore what’s revealed to you. If you feel something isn’t right, don’t shake it. Tune into that feeling and be aware of what’s happening around you. I promise you’ll thank yourself later.
As a writer, not being able to focus is a nightmare. One way to relieve myself of mental congestion is by doing a brain dump. I grab good ol’ pen and paper (or open a blank Google Doc), then I unload everything that’s been taking up residency in my mind.
I can feel the stress and anxiety escape from my fingers as I write (or type) everything out. In addition, I’ve observed that brain dumps help resolve problems that I previously struggled to find a solution to. There’s something about writing everything down that makes it easier to sort through things. Which in turn makes it easier to work towards a solution. A definite win-win for me.
If you ever find yourself mentally congested, try doing a brain dump. What’s the worst that can happen? It won’t work? Here’s the catch: you have to try it to find out.
I hear this all the time but like many things, you don’t understand its significance until you experience it. For the last couple of years, I struggled with a friend I’ve known for 20 years. Our lives went different places and we grew apart. I fought to keep the friendship alive, but my friend didn’t fight as hard.
Last year I let go of said friend. It still hurts to not have her in my life, but I understand that it’s for the best. We served our time together and it was time to part ways. I’ll always have the memories of our friendship and that makes me smile through the pain. Of all the lessons I’ve learned, this is one of the hardest.
You have to let go when time has been served. Don’t hold onto people (or things) in an act of defiance. Being defiant creates toxicity and you don’t need that. Let go. It might make you uncomfortable. It might make you sad. It might hurt like hell.
Nothing kills a dream faster than negativity. A while ago, I spoke to a friend about all the things I wanted to accomplish this year. I wasn’t looking for her approval, but instead, I was looking for her support. I ended up not getting her support. Instead, what I got was a bunch of negativity.
How are you going to do that?
Where is the money going to come from?
What’s the point in doing that?
Do you think that idea/dream will make money?
Every question she fired at me sounded like a pin popping a balloon. POP! POP! POP! POP! By the time our conversation ended, I had a migraine from hell. Not cool at all. I haven’t spoken to her much since, but I want to thank her for the lesson she taught me:
Sometimes you have to keep your cards close to your chest. Guard them until you’re ready to reveal your hand.
It’s really that simple.
Last week, I attended a pop-up party celebrating the music of Michael Jackson. I needed to release the stress and frustration of the week. When I arrived at the venue, the bass immediately soothed my muscles and I started feeling better.
Ever have one of those moments when you hear a song and it speaks to your current state of mind? Well, this happened as soon as “Off the Wall” came on. Check it out below.
The song is powerful, if you listen to the lyrics. Life has its stressful moments and you may feel like the burden is too heavy to carry. Instead of stressing yourself out about the burden, just live your life. Preferably off the wall.