28,835 Days of Being Present

My weekday consists of going to work, working, and going home. Weekends consists of errands, spending time with friends, and relaxing.  I definitely don’t make good use of my free time.

Then I saw the video below on my timeline that reminded me that I need to be more present:

After I watched the video, I legit reprimanded myself for wasting so much time over the years. Yes, naps are awesome, but those minutes could be spent doing something that would help me accomplish my goals.

How did you feel after watching the video? Share your thoughts in the comments and let’s chat!

Humble Thyself

The Recovering Pessimist: Humble Thyself-- Remember where you came from and how you got where you are. | www.therecoveringpessimist.me #amwriting #recoveringpessimist

When I was growing up, the elders in my life reminded me to always stay humble:

Don’t forget where you came from.

Keep the passion and drive that made you successful.

There’s always someone waiting in the wings for you to stumble.

I saw so many people get a taste of success and an ego to match. They just knew they were the bee’s knees and thought nobody could tell them otherwise. Little did they know, the Universe has a way of humbling you. Understanding that is enough of a reminder for me to stay humble.

Struggle is a part of my life and I wouldn’t change that for the world. It forces me to appreciate what I have and work twice as hard for the things I want. I’m forever grateful to my elders, whose wisdom keeps me humble. Stay humble, continue to grind, celebrate your wins, and your losses.

Success awaits you. Make it happen.

 

You Are the Common Denominator

The Recovering Pessimist: You Are the Common Denominator--When the same issues keep happening in various relationships, perhaps the common denominator is you. | www.therecoveringpessimist.me #amwriting #recoveringpessimistI have an associate who’s been involved in several failed relationships with men who have nothing of substance to contribute to a relationship. Each relationship comes with its own set of red flags that she either can’t see OR she sees them and chooses to ignore them.

Why can’t she see them and/or why would she ignore them?

She doesn’t want to be alone. It’s simple, yet so very complicated. It’s been my observation that her need to always have someone trumps having someone of quality. Being so focused on finding someone, she ends up accepting everyone. This is where the complicated aspect comes in.

In conversation, she complains about how the guys treat her. There’s a lot of take and take going on the guy’s side. When there’s nothing left to take, they leave. She’s been told by those close to her that these men aren’t worth anything, but it went in one end and out the other.

Which brings me to this:

Seriously, think about it. If you don’t want to be the common denominator, do the work. Get off the relationship wheel, recognize the recurring issues, understand your role(s) within those issues, and solve the equation. When you know better, you do better.

What Do You Stand to Lose?

Have you ever watched something on TV and you hear something that speaks to your state of mind at the moment? While live-tweeting  Season 11, Episode 20 of Grey’s Anatomy, the following tweet appeared on my timeline:

Here’s the back story. Prior to watching Grey’s Anatomy, I spent the day reflecting on the four goals I had made for the first quarter of 2015. I was so pissed and disappointment with myself for not accomplishing any of them.

You seriously wasted three months. 

Do you know how far you could be now if you got this shit done?

Now you have to work twice as hard…UGH!

Fast forward to watching Grey’s Anatomy that evening. When the above tweet hit my timeline, it was like someone had thrown ice cold water on me. I reminded myself of all the things I did have. I won a #LenovoSurprise and gained a lot of clarity on things that bothered me for months.

Honestly, I could lose these things just as quickly as I gained them. So yeah, I failed to do something I had intentions of doing. Am I upset about it? Yes. Can I undo the past few months? No. What I can do is to make the most of each day by working towards my goals.

It’s as simple as that.

 

 

 

Stand Your Ground

Stand Your Ground--Don't allow your fear of what others think keep you silent.|www.therecoveringpessimist.me When I was in undergrad, I took a course on business psychology. Of all the topics the course covered, the most interesting one to me was groupthink.

In a groupthink situation, problems and/or issues are handled as a group. The outcome is agreed to by all members of the group, even if group members don’t necessarily agree.

But why would someone want to just go with the group when they know the solution isn’t the best?

The answer: Fear.

Going against the grain, even if your thoughts and/or ideas are good, can be frightening. There’s a fear of being isolated by the group, which can lead to tension. If the environment is already full of tension, why add more by going against the group?

The answer: Because you need to stand your ground.

Sacrificing your thoughts and/or feelings for those of the majority can be extremely uncomfortable. But you know what’ seven more uncomfortable? Being miserable because you didn’t stand your ground.  Is going with the group worth it?  Absolutely not.

Your thoughts, feelings, and creativity are yours. Nobody can take them from you. Don’t let fear allow you to be miserable. Say what you mean, mean what you say, and stand your ground.